SUMMARY: In Plato's "Allegory of the Cave", Socrates explains how "Most people ,including ourselves, live in a world of relative ignorance. We are even comfortable with that ignorance,because its all we know. But once you go beyond your ignorance you will not ever want to go back to being ignorant". But the people don't want to go beyond and if any one goes beyond and wants to teach them the truth they ignore him and live the way they have been living all their life.
He explains that prisoners are tied with chains,facing a wall in a cave so they cannot move.Behind them a fire is blazing at a distance and between the prisoners and the fire there is a road or a passage and they could only see what ever passes through that road it created a shadow on that wall. Men carrying various materials which appeared over the wall as a shadow and the prisoners only recognized one thing in their life are those shadows.Among them a prisoner was released and he went out of the cave and saw the colors of the world and learned new things and came back to the cave again to tell his mates about the outer world of the cave but all the other prisoners thought that he is also the same shadow that they see every day and didn't recognize their mate and never tried to learn what he was trying to teach them.
Blog Series Evaluation 1:
ReplyDeleteA good first blog series. :-)
For the next series, try to write longer, especially when we summarize and respond to readings. Take time out of class if necessary--the practice will be worth the time.
1. Is the main idea (thesis) of the passage clearly and correctly stated?
ReplyDeleteThe main idea of the passage is stated, but not clearly.
2. Are the important supporting ideas stated correctly and fully?
Yes.
3. Are all (or nearly all) unimportant ideas excluded?
Yes.
4. Is the summary in the writer’s own words?
Yes.
5. Is the summary written with few grammar/spelling/style errors?
There are a few errors that I noticed.
6. Does the summary retain the sense and organization of the original passage?
To some extent, towards the end, the summary loses its organization.
7. Is personal opinion included in the summary?
No.
Hello Murad. I'm Angelica. :]
-First off, I'd like to point out that you wrote a pretty good summary of the text. All of the main points were presented in an organized fashion and were written in your own words.
-Though the first portion of your summary is a good analysis of how you interpreted the text, it is irrelevant to the actual summary. A summary should not contain any personal opinion of the text, only the main points.
-In your summary, though you had very well-constructed sentences, your sentences didn't really have commas.
Eg: Behind them a fire is blazing at a distance and between the prisoners and the fire there is a road or a passage and they could only see what ever passes through that road it created a shadow on that wall.
This is a run-on sentence, this can be corrected by adding more punctuation:
Eg: Behind them, a fire is blazing at a distance. Between the prisoners and the fire, there is a road or a passage and they could only see whatever passes through that road. It created a shadow on that wall.
There are more sentences in your work just like this one. If you add more punctuation and correct the run-on sentences, it will clarify your work and make it easier to read.
-In the beginning of your summary, you wrote "He explains...", this can be confusing, so make sure you state that it was Plato.
-I also feel that you should add more to the summary. Consider these points:
1. How did the prisoner feel when he was freed from the cave?
2. How did the other prisoners feel about him when he returned to the cave?
I hope this helped you out Murad. :]
1. Is the main idea (thesis) of the passage clearly and correctly stated?
ReplyDeleteYes.
2. Are the important supporting ideas stated correctly and fully?
Yes.
3. Are all (or nearly all) unimportant ideas excluded?
Yes.
4. Is the summary in the writer’s own words?
Yes.
5. Is the summary written with few grammar/spelling/style errors?
I noticed a few grammar and punctuation errors.
6. Does the summary retain the sense and organization of the original passage?
Yes, though at the end, the summary loses most of its organization.
7. Is personal opinion included in the summary?
No.
Hello Murad. My name is Angelica. :] First off, I'd like to say that you wrote a good, well-constructed summary. You expressed all of the important main points. However, the first portion of your summary, though it is a good interpretation of your analysis, is irrelevant to the summary. When writing a summary, you should not include any personal opinion of the text.
I noticed that you lacked in usage of punctuations such as commas. You also had some run on sentences.
Eg: Behind them a fire is blazing at a distance and between the prisoners and the fire there is a road or a passage and they could only see what ever passes through that road it created a shadow on that wall.
Without punctuation, the sentence is somewhat hard to read. It should look something more like this:
Behind them, a fire is blazing at a distance. Between the prisoners and the fire there is a road or a passage. They could only see whatever passes through that road. It created a shadow on that wall.
This makes the sentence a lot easier to read and organizes the sentence.
You did include important points, however, your summary lacks in length. I think you should consider the following:
1.How did the prisoner feel when he is freed from the cave?
2.How did the other prisoners feel when the prisoner returned to the cave?
I hope you consider the suggestions I offered. :]
1. Is the main idea (thesis) of the passage clearly and correctly stated?
ReplyDeleteYes
2. Are the important supporting ideas stated correctly and fully?
Yes
3. Are all (or nearly all) unimportant ideas excluded?
Yes.
4. Is the summary in the writer’s own words?
Yes.
5. Is the summary written with few grammar/spelling/style errors?
I notices a few grammar errors.
6. Does the summary retain the sense and organization of the original passage?
Yes, though it lost some of the organization at the end.
7. Is personal opinion included in the summary?
No.
Hello Murad, my name is Angelica. :] First off, I'd like to say you wrote a very good summary of the piece. You included all of the main points and veered away from unimportant pieces. However, the first paragraph (and the first paragraph only) of your entry is irrelevant to the actual summary because it contains your analysis of what you believe the text represents or means to you. This isn't what you should do in a summary.
Another thing I noticed is that you didn't really include the appropriate punctuation marks needed, and you had a lot of run-on sentences.
Eg: Behind them a fire is blazing at a distance and between the prisoners and the fire there is a road or a passage and they could only see what ever passes through that road it created a shadow on that wall.
This sentence is a run on sentence. It can be fixed with punctuation:
Behind them, a fire is blazing at a distance. Between the prisoners and the fire, there is a road or a passage and they could only see whatever passes through that road. It created a shadow on that wall.
When you add punctuation, the sentence is much clearer and more organized.
Another thing you can improve on is the length of your summary. Though you were aware of many of the main points, you missed out on a couple. Consider the following:
1. How did the prisoner feel after being freed from the cave?
2. How did the other prisoners react when he came back?
3. How does Plato explain the true meaning of the Allegory at the end?
I hope I helped you Murad. :]
Angelica.
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